Luke 12:24

I struggle with worrying more than anything else. I can barely get through reading a paragraph without my mind bouncing to something that I am worried about, sending me side tracked to my to-do list. I firmly believe in the calming power of writing something down, checking something off of a list. The way in which I know I have documented something that I don't want to forget makes me believe it has already been accomplished. Of course that is far from actuality. In actuality, I get things accomplished, things that have an expiration that is...some how or another I hand that paper in, pay that bill, make it to that meeting. When I think about all that I worry about, there is no history of me needing to worry about anything on my account. But what about things that have no immediate due date? What about things that I have no history of?

Planning my wedding this January. 

Graduating in May. 

Finding a career path.

Living with someone new.

Being a wife.

Failure is scary, as well as just-not-succeeding. I am more afraid I guess that I may fall in the middle of failure and success...that I am not going to put enough effort into either side to stand out. Failure, in some cases may not take any effort, but on the other hand it may take risk as well. Risk can be admired. Can I be admired for being mediocre in my walk with Christ? Can I worry about myself and my future so much as to neglect the hope and faith of success, joy and promise that having a relationship with God provides? It is possible and in-admirable. Ultimate fail. 

The Bible tells us in Luke 12:24 to consider the ravens. God provides food, shelter and freedom to birds...they don't have to plan weddings, pay rent for their high-rise branches, or choose a path in life. No offense to the birds, but we are incomparable to them on the level of God's love! I have no clue what the future is going to bring, and I am genuinely freaked out about it, but on the other hand I know that God is in control, and he is a loving God. I am still going to put forth an immense effort towards my future, but it's not all going to be self-centered...it will be towards my reliance on God. If I fail, it will be because God has a better offer, and it's not ready for me yet.